[Because of an employee non-disclosure agreement I can’t write about any clients or companies I worked for through IBM nor any details of projects I worked on. Also, what I write here is my own opinion and views. I haven’t been employed by IBM since 2002.]

June is Gay Pride Month so for one of my last entries of the month I thought I’d recall some of the experiences I had working for IBM. Last week I stumbled upon a friend’s blog — Sarah Siegel’s Stories. I know Sarah from EAGLE, IBM’s LGBT diversity group.

IBM is dedicated to diversity. All of the Fortune 50 companies today (except ExxonMobil) offer domestic-partner benefits. Most companies talk about diversity in one form or another. At IBM they truly stand behind their words.

My first day on the job was January 2, 1997. If memory serves, IBM started offering domestic-partner benefits starting on that very day. I can’t remember how long I worked there before I stumbled upon EAGLE. When I joined EAGLE it was the beginning of a life-changing experience. The people I met through the group (we had monthly dinners in New York and an online forum within IBM) were just incredible. The group itself was, like IBM, very diverse with men and women from all over the world. It also included people from new hires to senior executives. Within EAGLE we were all equal.

After being in EAGLE for a while I noticed a posting where they were looking for somebody to fill IBM’s first-ever LGBT community service assignment. For a community service assignment IBM lends an employee to a non-profit organization or school for up to one year at no cost. The assignment was at one of the national LGBT charities that IBM supports. I decided to apply for it and was accepted.

I remember meeting my manager to ask permission to work the assignment. I had just been transfered to IBM’s new (at the time) consulting group for Microsoft technologies. I met with my manager at the IBM building on 5th Avenue in Manhattan. We sat down and I said, “I have something to tell you and something to ask you. First, I’m gay.” He was a young, married, straight guy. “Oh, that’s okay. No problem!”

He thought I was nervous about coming out to him. What I was nervous about was asking for a year off from my job just after transferring. In the end I got the assignment and worked for an LGBT charity for one year. It was an incredible personal experience (though the technology work itself wasn’t as challenging as my day-to-day work at IBM).

Working with people who have dedicated their lives fighting for equal rights and non-discrimination was awe inspiring. When the year-long assignment was over I was looking forward to getting back to my consulting job but there was one more thing IBM had lined up first. At the end of July 2000 IBM held their first-ever “Gay and Lesbian Leadership Conference” at IBM’s headquarters in Armonk, New York.

They brought together about 100 gay and lesbian employees (mostly managers and executives) from all over the world. Those three days were probably the proudest three work-days I ever had. We had conferences, workshops, discussion groups, guest speakers and a Q&A breakfast with IBM’s top senior executives. It was amazing. IBM’s diversity department presented me with a crystal eagle as recognition for my community service assignment. I shared with the group how fulfilling the experience was.

During those three days I made friends who will probably be part of my life forever. The last afternoon when people were leaving, mostly to head to airports to fly back to where ever they were from, was very emotional. I had never seen people leaving a business conference on the verge of tears before.

Before resigning in 2002 I participated in other EAGLE events. For one event a university in California was looking for people from the business world to discuss being out in corporate America. I volunteered. Employees from two other large companies and I each got a chance to tell about our experiences with being out at work. That was followed with questions from the audience.

The last big LGBT event I attended while with IBM was a gala charity dinner in Los Angeles. IBM bought a table and had a couple of extra tickets so a friend and I went. It was a star-filled night. I remember getting up during the event to go to the restroom and I nearly knocked over Megan Mullally, the actress who played Karen Walker on the sitcom “Will & Grace.” When I got back to the table Megan was on stage singing. After dinner there was a dance. I remember Sarah Siegel, my friend and I hanging out watching Malissa Etheridge and her then-girlfriend now-wife Tammy Lynn Michaels on the dance floor.

I’m very grateful for my time with IBM. They helped me be proud of who I am, not just the part of me that knows how to help clients with their computers and networks, but as a complete human being. I’m also happy to have reconnected with Sarah. She and her girlfriend are arriving today in India. Sarah is on a six-month assignment with IBM India. It’s going to be fun reading of her experiences there.

Good luck with your adventures Sarah and Pat!

Hmm, I seem to be on a writing spree. I’ve had a cold/flu since Sunday so maybe I’m starting to feel better. Also, we just got past the winter solstice so the days are going to start getting longer! Even though it’s the first days of winter (cold) the days get longer (sun) which is good (smile). Maybe the cold (the weather and the one in my nose) along with the short days accounts for my more-negative-than-usually rantings lately. Uruguay is a wonderful country. Those of you who live here can probably relate to some of the things I wrote about in my last few posts. Those who aren’t here yet should know what to expect. One of the things that attracts a lot of foreigners to Uruguay is that it feels like going back in time to a more innocent era. One of the things that drives a lot of foreigners crazy about Uruguay is that it feels like going back in time! There’s good and there’s bad which can sum up life anywhere on this planet. The good in Uruguay, in my opinion far outweighs the bad. Sometimes I get frustrated and impatient and wish things would change but then I realize that if things were to change too much it just wouldn’t be unique anymore.

With few exceptions every couple in the expat community here is binational. Gay (JP and me) and straight (almost everybody else). Has anybody else noticed this? We have Uruguay/USA, Uruguay/Canada, Uruguay/Brazil, Argentina/Canada, Germany/Canada, Colombia/USA, and more. It’s really one of the things I love about the community here. It’s not a North American group, or an English-speaking group. It’s nice. It is, for me, one of the special things about life in Uruguay.

It would be nice to have more out gay people in the group though. JP and I are getting tired of carrying the rainbow flag around by ourselves.

A bunch of my gay friends are reading this blog as well as some guys (and gals?) who have stumbled upon it. I know some of you are considering a move to Uruguay so I thought I’d write a little about gay life here. Actually “a little” is all I’m really qualified to write since I haven’t really sought out the local gay scene. When I was in my twenties I lived in New York City and Miami. Back then I did plenty of socializing in gay discos, bars and night clubs. These days I’d rather stay home and watch paint dry than hang out in a bar. So if anybody is looking for a source for gay nightlife info I’m definitely not your guy.

As for everyday life as a gay man in Montevideo it’s pretty much been a non-issue. JP and I are completely out. We have gay friends and straight friends. Mostly straight friends actually. Uruguayans as a whole are very educated and therefore maybe a bit more open minded. Uruguay is also a non-religious secular society with a very strong separation of church and state. Because of their history (mostly Spanish and Italian immigrants) the culture has a lot of Catholic influences but without active meddling from the Vatican. [I don’t want to turn this into an anti-religion post since, though I’m an atheist, I respect everybody’s individual spiritual choices and I whole-heartedly defend the freedom of religious expression in the context of true separation of church and state. I do have a problem though with organized religions that preach hatred and intolerance towards gay people.]

In Montevideo there are several gay clubs and bars but there is no gay ghetto. I’ve noticed more gay people in the Pocitos and Punta Carretas neighborhoods but that could be because these are the two neighborhoods where I spend most of my time. Again though, these are definitely not gay neighborhoods like Chelsea, West Hollywood, the Castro, or South Beach.

I received the following comment from Larkin:

“I’m also gay and in my mid-20’s. I’m moving to Montevideo from Atlanta in May. Info on gay Montevideo is hard to come by, I know that it’s laid-back, and that’s part of it’s appeal to me. Any info on what neighborhood to rent in (Pocitos perhaps?)”

Yep, Montevideo’s gay scene can definitely be described as laid back. Pocitios is probably a good choice for you. There a lot of younger people (20s and 30s), it has a nice beach, and there’s plenty of restaurants and shopping within walking distance. Pocitos is a densely populated neighborhood with many high-rise apartments. Punta Carretas and Buceo are on either side of Pocitos and they’re both more mixed with high-rise apartments and single-family houses. Both are very nice. Parque Rodó is also a cool area. It’s probably more middle class while the others are middle to upper.

A great source for real estate listings is BuscandoCasa.com. Also, my realtor Lucia del Castillo is absolutely wonderful. She’s been in real estate here in Montevideo for a very long time. She speaks English and is very, very honest. She and her husband don’t have any children so Lucia has “adopted” JP and me as her sons so I’ve gotten to know her on a personal basis as well. Her Web site is luciadelcastillo.com and her email is info@luciadelcastillo.com.

This is part of a comment from William:

Wow what a gold mine, to find your blog. I’ve been reading Uruguayan Blogs for a little over a year now. My interest comes from wanting to find a place for semi-retirement. I’m a young 47 year old Gay man living and working in Seattle. I’ve read most of the other noted English language blogs and recently purchased Southron’s e-guide to Uruguay. But since I am gay and I don’t speak or read Spanish I’ve found hardly any info from a gay perspective.

The book William refers to, “Southron’s Guide to Living in Uruguay,” is an absolute must for anybody considering a move to Uruguay. It’s a well-researched reference full of useful information. Southron keeps it interesting with a great sense of humor. You can buy it directly from Southron’s Uruguay Living blog.

If anybody out there has questions about specific topics — gay or not — please feel free to ask. Uruguay and Montevideo offer an endless amount of topics for blog posts but if I can address a subject that’s of particular interest to people I’d be happy to do it.